Monday, March 19, 2012

Dave's a Dick (10 of ?)






A friend pointed this ad out to me and the whole scenario is just so creepy! I just HAD to respond!

 

Original ad by "Mounir":



Kijiji Alberta > Calgary > real estate > room rental, roommates > Ad ID *********

share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE

Date Listed 16-Mar-12
Price $250.00
Address Alberta T**, Canada
View map
Furnished Yes
Pet Friendly No
This shared-bed is perfect for a clean, dd free working female

I am 29 years old male looking to share my room with single female. I'm have an average body, it is nice and very clean room in two bedroom house, Internet and laundry included, I work a lot and on weekends. I am looking for someone quiet, clean that will keep the room and bathroom clean all the times. I do not smoke, or drink. I'm a positive thinker, and a bit of an introvert. I don't like going to bars, I use laptop in bed sometimes so I hope that doesn't keep you up, I am definitely NOT looking for Intimate Encounter or a relationship, The bed is big warm and cozy, and if we have any chemistry between us you are more than welcome to cuddle with me. just looking for someone nice busy with work, disease free, clean with no drama, just normal person, easy going not bossy or picky and has no attitude, no game player

Should this advertisement attract you, kindly respond with few words about yourself and your number and we can meet for coffee and try it for while.

room cost $400 each one of us will pay $250 for the room


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Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2012 17:06:53 -0700
From: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji
To: ******@hotmail.com


Dear Gentleman with a room,

I came across your advertizement and I am very interested. I am new to Calgary and am currently working as a server full time. I am clean, neat, and quiet. Also dd free and p/o.

I assume there are other people living in the other bedroom of the home? What kind of people are they? Quiet too, I hope? Also, how is the neighbourhood? It's close to work and I wouldn't mind walking from time to time and I just want to know if it's safe.

Warmest regards,

Davina


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From: Mounir R**** <******@hotmail.com>
To: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Sent: Friday, March 16, 2012 6:28:59 PM
Subject: RE: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


Hey,

Yes , there is one person and he is nice and safe,and this is whatv I am looking for too, Can you send me you number and I will text you or call you and give you the info u like to know

Thanks
Adam (Mounir)


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Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2012 19:03:24 -0700
From: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji
To: ******@hotmail.com

Dear Mounir,

Thank you for your timely reply. I am currently at work and I'm using the server computer in order to email you. I unfortunately left my cell phone at the YWCA where I am currently staying. Perhaps we could talk on the phone tomorrow evening?

The YWCA is quite an awful place to stay. Last week, while I was reaching my hand into the vending machine to try and score a free Snickers bar, my roommate came running up to me screaming about how her condylomata acuminata was flowering and she needed the toilet scrubber to relieve the itch. I told her the scrubber was in with the cleaning supplies but of course she didn't know where that was. I don't mind cleaning, but it would be nice if this roommate would stop using the floor mounted mirror to check for clusters and pick up a mop from time to time.
I shared this story because I would like to know if you would also clean up the bedroom and bathroom? As I said, I don't mind cleaning but not if I am the only person doing the cleaning.

Do you have a television in the bedroom? And an internet connection? I completely understand using a laptop in bed. Sometimes I would be using it to Skype with friends from back home, and it would have to be in the evening because of the time difference. I hope that would be okay. The person I talk to the most is my friend Nahsawnd Inawtabel and she is hard of hearing so we usually use the webcam and speak in sign language. I would not be talking at all so you would be able to sleep.

You mention that the bed is big. Is it a queen size bed? I hope it is not a twin size bed or else we would not be able to fit! LOL

Warmest regards,

Davina

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From: Mounir R***** <******@hotmail.com>
To: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Sent: Friday, March 16, 2012 10:03:26 PM
Subject: RE: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

Hi Davina,

You can call or text me tomorrow and maybe we can meet for coffee , my number is 403 ***-****
as for cleaning we have to be very clear about this from start, every thing will always be cleaned in bedroom bathroom and kitchen just for respecting each other
we can do sheets every weekend and when ever you like, I have queen bed which I thing very big but there is only TV in living room, I will show you the place anyway after we meet tomorrow, send  me you number please and let me know if you free to meet after 6:00PM


Best regards,


Adam (Mounir)

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From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sat, 17 Mar 2012 13:13:38
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

Dear Mounir,



Sorry for the delay in replying to you. The girls and I were playing crotch games with a whiffle bat in the YWCA courtyard last night (we had our St. Patrick's Day drinks last night instead of tonight) and it completely slipped my mind to email you back. I have just been cleaning up the room I share, as we made a bit of clutter while having a pillow fight because one of the pillows exploded and we decided to tar and feather our dorm mistress while she slept. I have decided that it would probably be prudent to invent a specialized pillow just for pillow fights! A pillow that will not break apart no matter how hard you hit someone. Do you think that would be a good idea? We could then have pillow fights without worrying that the pillows will break and feathers ending up all over the room.



I admit that I am quite a playful person and sometimes will do something silly like having a pillow fight or playing hide and seek with neighbourhood strays. If that is a problem for you, I assure you I will remain completely mature when in the home with you.


I am happy to hear that you and I will share the cleaning responsibilities. I was worried that I would have to do all the upkeep and that was certainly not appealing to me. As for sheets, I would probably like to clean them two or three times a week because of my lactating, but I'll clean them every time because I respect that it can be inconvenient. Being p/o sometimes has it's disadvantages when it comes to the hormone therapy. :(



I will be working at the restaurant this evening so we cannot meet for coffee. However, you're more than welcome to come down and say hi! I work at Hooters. There are two in Calgary and I work at the restaurant on MacLeod Trail because it's an easy train ride from downtown where I'm currently living. The address is 4608 MacLeod Trail S. Just ask the hostess to seat you in Davina's section or ask for me (though I'm not allowed to seat you). I'll make sure not to take my break until you arrive so that we can have some time to sit and talk together. I'm working 5PM to close (which is 1AM tonight).



If you cannot swing by tonight, that's okay. Just drop me an email as I won't have my cell with me. I am a little hesitant to give you my cell number right now anyway because I don't know you. A beautiful single w man in Calgary has to take care of herself! :) Once we meet and I'm comfortable with you, I'll happily give you my number. If we do get along, when could I come to see the room?



Warmest regards,



Davina

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From: ******@hotmail.com
Date: Sat, 17 Mar 2012 15:25:22
To: Davina Leettrol<smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Reply-To: ******@hotmail.com
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


Ok , I will try to stop around 6, I am sure it will be busy there , if we agreed on every thing when u looking to move?

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone powered by Mobilicity

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 From: Mounir Rifai <******@hotmail.com>
To: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Sent: Saturday, March 17, 2012 5:37:42 PM
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

I am now at the  Hooters but staff told me they do not know any one in this name, anyways let me know what time is good for you to meet tomorrow if you free at 5 or after

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone powered by Mobilicity
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 From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sat, 18 Mar 2012 20:17:13
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


Dear Mounir,

I don't understand. You came here and someone said I wasn't there? Who did you talk to when you were here? I was on the floor serving customers. Are you sure you were at the south restaurant on MacLeod Trail and not the north restaurant off Barlow Trail? I was waiting and waiting to take my break because I thought you would be coming in to the restaurant!

I feel terrible that you came all this way and someone told you I was not there. I almost cried when I read your email. I'm not well liked here because most of the girls don't think I should be working here since I was not born a woman. But they're jealous because I am so beautiful. I will try my hardest to be available after 5PM tomorrow. We can meet somewhere near your home this time. Is there a Tim Hortons or other coffee shop located near you? I would be happy to meet at any coffee shop as long as it isn't a Second Cup. One time I was drinking a latte with a friend in a Second Cup downtown when a barista came up to our table and asked us to stop putting our faces in the latte mug and blowing. I told the barista that we were making bubbles because we wanted to see if we could carbonate the drink. I'm not sure why, but my friend then picked her nose and ate it. It was at that time that a man at the condiment table vomited into the cinnamon shaker, which caused a chain reaction of vomiting from other patrons that resulted in a very slippery floor and a highly offensive odour in the coffee house. My friend and I were asked never to come back and I have since then not wanted to go to a Second Cup again.

But I digress. My break is over and I have to get back to work now. Let me know when you can about where we could meet. And please accept my sincerest apologies that someone here told you I was not in the restaurant when I am here. I'm furious! I will be talking to my boss about this later tonight.

Warmest regards,

Davina



Sent from my iPhone

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From: Mounir R***** <******@hotmail.com>
To: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Sent: Saturday, March 17, 2012 10:17:49 PM
Subject: RE: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

Hi Davina,

there was old man with big saint patrick hat asked me to pick a place, I picked one and when I asked the girl about you she told me there is no one in this name, I think she did this to get the tips. she told me she has been working there for year and knows everyone, I was setting on the third table next on the right side of the door and got ice tea only at 5:30PM

we can meet at the Tim's next to sunridge mall if you like around 6 if you not working tomorrow night, or we might can meet at 1:30 if I am still up and can meet you tonight

i attached copy of photos for the place and me, can you send me yours, how long you been in Calgary for, 
I have some thought but can you please clarify for me what do you mean by p/o


Best regards,


Mounir







----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Mounir R***** <******@hotmail.com>
To: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Sent: Sunday, March 18, 2012 12:58:00 PM
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

Hey,

I did not hear back from you yet, I hope you ok,please let me know soon please because  I have someone would like to see the room and would like to meet you and talk first


Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone powered by Mobilicity

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From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2012 15:38:24
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


Dear Mounir,

I'm sorry for the delay. I got off work at 1AM last night but had to close the restaurant. I didn't get home until nearly 2:30AM and I slept in right til it was time to go to work. I am working until 8PM tonight, so meeting at 6PM at Tim Hortons won't work. Perhaps later in the evening.

The older man with the hat was Stanley. It's a shame you did not tell him you were here to see me as he would have sat  you in my section. The girl who served you was almost certainly Janet. Either that or you were seated in Chrissy's section. Whoever it was, they don't know jack about who works there. I was there when you were there. I'll be contacting the manager Larry about this fiasco.


Thank you for the photos. You are very handsome. I cannot wait to kiss you!

Who else is interested in sharing the room? Do you think the bed would be big enough for all three of us? When I was in high school, me and a group of friends went on a road trip to Gahtchagud, North Dakota for spring break. When we got to the hotel, only one of the two rooms we booked was available. So all six of us crammed into a king sized bed. It wasn't very comfortable because Ralph and Lana kept feeling each other up while I was between them. Fortunately, Terri said she had enough and booted Ralph to the floor. Cindy took Ralph's spot and things were a lot better so we could sleep. However, this would only be you, me, and this other girl, so it should be okay to share the bed. Does this girl like girls or just boys? I like girls and boys.

I have been in Calgary for 13 years, though it feels like 37. I had been married to a man for ten years until he found out I was p/o. I should have told him but we were just so happy. For the last three years I have been living in a shelter because I could not find a place to live. Until I met you! Now I'm so happy because I get to share a bed with a handsome man named Mounir and Troll (my dog). He does not shed and he's very clean. He's a bit big but he usually sleeps at the foot of the bed. Sometimes he gets bored at night and will lick your face while you're sleeping, but that's rare. Sometimes he sits on my face when I'm trying to sleep too. What a silly puppy! The worst we'll have to worry about is if he gets gas overnight. His toots are smelly! I've attached a picture of Troll with my ex-husband Lex. 

Warmest Regards,

Davina

P.S. I've included a picture of me too!

P.P.S. p/o stands for post operation. When I was 19 I underwent a sex-change operation from man to woman. But it's okay. I now have a vagina so we can have sexual intercourse every night. Mwah! 



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From: Mounir R***** <******@hotmail.com>
To: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Sent: Sunday, March 18, 2012 6:00:58 PM
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

Well . I had it clear in the add that I am not looking for sex, I work night shifts so we will not share bed at the same time, send me you number,

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone powered by Mobilicity

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From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2012 19:34:51
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


Dear Mounir,

I understand that you are not looking for sex. I'm sorry that I suggested it. Sometimes I don't think before I say something. Forgive me?

It's unfortunate that we will not be sharing the bed at the same time. Do you mind that Troll will sleep on the bed in the day with you? He's very cuddly so I'm sure you'll love his company!

I'm sorry for the delay. I was packing up the U-Haul today with my things and am now officially moved out of the YWCA. I'm staying at the Super 8 motel on Barlow Trail near 32nd Avenue for the evening. I'll be moving in with you tomorrow morning (Monday March 19, 2012). Troll is jumping up and down and I think he knows we're moving again! We're both very excited to live with you!

Will anyone be home in the morning since you will be sleeping? Or can you leave a key under the mat for me? Our third roommate Greg will be with me to help move everything in so you won't have to worry about getting up to help. Greg also works nights so he'll probably just climb into bed with you once we're done moving everything in. Talk to you soon!

Warmest regards,

Dave

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From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2012 22:04:45
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

I have not heard back from you yet. I hope everything is okay. I have given Greg your phone number and he will call you at 8AM tomorrow to arrange moving in. If he can't get a hold of you, we will have to unload the truck in the front yard as we only have the truck until 5PM. See you tomorrow!

Warmest Regards,

Dave
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From: Mounir R***** <******@hotmail.com>
To: smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com
Sent: Sunday, March 18, 2012 10:11:20 PM
Subject: RE: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working female in NE" Ad on Kijiji

are you going to drive from Burnaby in one day? I can take day off if you like, I will just wait for you till you get there, and we can have your friend stay on air bed if you like, but the other girl who saw the room today liked it too, so we will work something out,
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From: Davina Leettrol <smallwonderfancollaborative@yahoo.com>
Date: Sun, 18 Mar 2012 22:20:22
To: <******@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: Reply to your "share my bed , room to share with single working
female in NE" Ad on Kijiji


I don't understand. I'm not in Burnaby. I'm in a motel on Barlow Trail. About a five minute drive away from you. 

As for Greg, he will not want the air mattress. He has back problems. Also,he will want to cuddle with you. You and Greg can share the bed (and Troll can sleep on the bed too). I will sleep on the air mattress with the other girl. 

Anyway, my baby is crying and needs to be fed. I should go!

Warmest Regards,

Dave

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No reply. Turns out Mounir hates babies. So he can't be all bad.

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